Day 40 of Lochlan’s healing journey with leukaemia was another day well spent at the fair. Another day that we could pretend that life was normal and that he wasn’t sick. Other than two hour nap in the middle of the day and his mobility issues today was normal. And I honestly don’t want this week to end.
The break from chemo made Lochlan come back to us… his personality, his energy, etc. The fact that he found happiness for the first time since this whole leukaemia journey started was such a blessing. The fact he could see beautiful and expressed gratitude was such a gift.
He told me tonight, as we got back home, “I know this is kind of weird for me to say, considering I have cancer, but I am excited about life. Because someday I know I will be cancer free and can do everything without having to worry.”
I am not being naive to think that the prognosis for his type of cancer won’t apply to him. I fully realize that this whole path ahead is experimental and they can’t guarantee anything for him. But I also believe that the body is made to heal. That a positive mindset, good nutrition, a nontoxic environment, a pure and full foundation as a young boy, holistic support, and a whole lot of trust in God and love from so many can contribute to him beating the odds.
The harsh reality is there are no guarantees. I can’t help but wonder about next year’s fair, and the year after, and the year after and wonder what will he be like? Will he still be here?
Tomorrow is the last day of the fair. And Monday we go to the local hospital for bloodwork. If blood counts are up we start the second phase of his leukaemia treatment at the children’s hospital on Tuesday. And the normalcy of the fair will slip away to be replaced by hospitals and chemo. So I don’t want this week to end. I wish we could be stuck in our own Groundhog Day and relive these good days over and over.
But instead, we’ll carry the memories of this week into what plays ahead and instead of getting overwhelmed by it all we’ll simply take one step forward each day.
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